If someone acts in a way that’s prickly to you, what’s your natural response? You know. They talked over you while you were telling a story, showed up considerably late and didn’t apologize, or maybe talked behind you when you weren’t around to speak up for yourself. Does your blood boil to where you secretly want to get even?
It can be hard to bear with some people which is understandable as we all come from different upbringings, experiences, and perspectives. However, a heart of retaliation can lead to actions that result in hurt feelings on both sides, and events you didn’t want to happen. The good news is that there’s a way to coexist and possibly even have a good rapport with individuals who push your buttons or outright have unkind intentions towards you. What does that look like?
WHAT DID JESUS DO?
“To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. “He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.” When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” – 1 Peter 2: 21-25
Think about how Jesus was on the cross. He experienced it all. Beatings, embarrassment, loneliness…and yet he didn’t retaliate. Instead, he entrusted himself to God, who judges justly. In the end, we have to leave it to God to judge and let him decide what to do about the person’s actions.
LISTEN AND LOVE
“But to you who are listening, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.
“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Luke 6: 27-36
Ask yourself “do I have the heart to be more like Christ about this.” If not, pray and ask God for clarity, wisdom, discernment, and of course, the willingness. Ask God to help with your heart–to soften it, and give you the desire and strength to overcome the emotion that has been stirred up by someone. Also, pray for the heart of the person you feel negatively about. Strive to have compassion for them and understanding from their point of view.
ANOTHER LEVEL KIND OF LOVE
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. – Matthew 5:43-48
God’s supernatural help is needed to love people who act unjustly. God is the source of your love. He pours out his love in you and gives you the power to love, even those you feel hostile towards. You can’t love your enemies on your own–you need help from God. Trust God to help show love for those who you may not feel love for.
PAY IT FORWARD
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” – Romans 12: 21
Grace is an undeserved favor. If you have experienced God’s grace, strive to pass it on to others. Love them the way Jesus loves you–be willing to forgive them. Giving into retaliation will hurt you just as much as it hurts the person that offended you. Even if your enemy keeps giving you a hard time, forgiving them will set you free from the temptation of getting even.
Take it Action
● Pray for your enemies. Pray about their action and for their heart, which is where everything starts.
● Choose to forgive, to be set free from the burden of bitterness
● Talk to them to heal the relationship. Find out what can be done to improve your connection.
● Find impactful ways to show love and kindness.
Rise and shine bright.
By: Tara Michel – Our Writers.